Suburban Night

Alex Mack and Aiden Ashley ring the doorbell like they’re about to ask for pledges for the PTA. On the other side, Derrick Pierce isn’t convinced the doorbell will actually ring until it does. He’s grinning when he lets them in; four nights ago, these two looked ready to bolt at the club. Apparently they chugged a double-shot of courage somewhere along the way. Ashley Fires claps like she’s announcing bingo night and declares she and Derrick “have the manual and the highlighters,” so they’re happy to lead the tutorial. Heat starts simmering before the coat rack gets put to use. Aiden pushes Alex toward Derrick with a little shove and a bigger smirk; Alex grins back, trading places just as Ashley grabs Aiden by the hips and plants a kiss that skips every polite hello. Hands are already under shirts, mouths are open, and the carpet hasn’t even gotten any footprints yet. The first moan cracks like a starter pistol. Welcome to whatever headline the neighborhood newsletter won’t print.